Hazelnut Reflections: Life Lessons 10/28

Thursday, October 28, 2004

Life Lessons 10/28

This has been a very powerful visit for me to my seminary alma mater. Some good workshops and chances to see very dear professors, plus the opportunity to make deeper friendships with alums and current students whose lives have intersected with mine.

My life is the richer for all of these interactions.

The theme I would put on the week--perhaps the events of the whole month--things seen and unseen. Since the events of last August in the Episcopal Church, it seems to me as if we are living through end-times--not the death of the whole church, as some proclaim, but as if a world I inhabited was coming to an end. Real crises reveal what is real under the surface. I have found out who truly supports and loves me; I have encountered what I believe is evil (as opposed to mediocre, faulty or imperfect); I am trying desperately to choose the light. I am someone who finds it easy to get along with others; I love people of many different shades and qualities, but now I also know there are times when I have to choose a side. There is pain and loss of relationships, but there is also grace in drawing closer to people who are with you.

One of the things about being an alum (as opposed to a student), wiser (I hope) and more able to see what is really going on, is that you get let in on what is going on underneath it all. I've learned some things about dear ones these past few days that are very painful to hear about. I've heard about more relationships that are not all they seemed to be. One of our presenters talked to us about leadership--that your congregation will not grow spiritually if you are not willing to grow deeper yourself. I hope that this month, with all its sorrows and challenges, is taking me deeper.

Let's be clear that I am also fully human, because I indulged for an hour yesterday in one of my own obsession/compulsions, and sped off the block for a quick trip to a local yarn shop (CloseKnit). Lovely yarn, but nothing that called out to me after my field trip to the Myers House on Monday, but I picked up a back issue of Interweave Knits for the train trip home (ok, so I've already leafed through it once. . .)